she's leaving w me bro, I've been buying her mad shots. She's seen my apt. So locked down.
just sold my soul for a pack of cigaroos. little do they know they got the short end of the deal. suckers.
It's always a relief to be able to look at some one, and remind yourself that there IS some one who gets laid less then yourself.
Theyr drawing diagrams to try to explain to me how high they are
Im making the walk of shame with half a box of pizza, its like when youre little and you get a goodie bag leaving the party
I woke up and someone had put toast at my feet. I was SO. HAPPY.
I was standing when I hit it. I barely made it to the couch before the walls started turning into people.
I'm confused are we getting high or did someone actually die?
So who won the naked front yard Olympics last night?
Well my tits are spray painted gold & i have what i think r the Olympic rings shaved in my vag !!!!!!!SO its safe to say i won something ....
Now that we have successfully procreated, I need to know we are on the same page. Please tell me you are aware that there are whole seasons of our lives that our child can NEVER be made privy to.
We should probably write this down. That's a shit load of shit.
Sometimes I think about the fact that I lost my virginity while watching anime and I wonder what that says about me
So you think Jesus would be proud of me for walking of shame into my apartment 10 minutes before I told my parents I'd be over for Easter?
he asked if he should bring the trash can into the room.. apparently i shoved my finger all over his face and said.. shhhh dont talk... just take your pants off.
Sex in the backyard? Check.
I don't know how it started but we all ended up shirtless andI was covered in crawfish and wearing a sombrero.
Randomize
