Bad news is im a slut again. Good news is its with people ive been a slut with before.
just found the land before time on youtube... I'm so fucked for finals
you know by doing this we are using dad as a drug mule right?
can you look at this picture and tell me if you think this my kid?
Nothing says 'good morning' like waking up only to realize this chick was watching you sleep. She's crazy
Thanks for coming to the hospital with me, In return, I will buy you ecstasy.
Oh, and I'm only keeping her around till spring. Doing the hunt for cunt is too tough in 12" of snow.
Sorry if this is weird, but please don't have sex in my truck. I get to be the first...
Hey remember that time you called a woman a "man in a dress" and then threw up in a drinking fountain?
I'm naked, I'm drunk, and I'm all up on social media right now
He put those pics of him with those girls on facebook and tagged his wife in them
Tequila 1 marriage 0
i may or may not have bought a plane ticket for a russian cam girl to fly here. also, can you spot me $300 on rent?
you don't go into accounting for the pussy....
He said that he had extra crunchy taquitos and wanted to go down on me.. I mean how could I say no?
Here when you come to your senses come back here and I'll fuck you back out of them.
Randomize
