saw "Pah-jure" lube. Thought of you. Wearing the same clothes to work tomorrow.
I stayed in, ate a pint of Hagen daas and watched a movie about aids. Soooooooo single.
Say my name once during sex just to fuck with her. Like when it gets rough.
The dentist just called my mother to confirm the appointment that I made on his answering machine at 4:33 am this morning..
We just watched planet earth in marine bio. And our prof told us that was all we were doing on 420
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just put all of my beerlympics medals into my academic awards box. i would say they are my greatest achievement since college.
okay, certainly we can't screw this up, and even as I type, I know we will
She has puke in her hair, is missing a shoe and is now crying. People trust her to be their child's teacher
Turned on my GPS and all that it said in the search bar was "beer,"
It's not even like I care. He was cute 30lbs ago and before he fucked that Michael Jackson look alike.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Walk of shaming dressed as a zombie hunter. This hangover feels like the actual apocalypse.
Is this the guy that did shots off my ass at the beach? Haha
just pleasured myself to USA hockey beating Russia in the shoot out. god bless America.
Started crying to "that's the way it is" by celine. What the fuck uterus?!
I feel like my life just hangs in the balance of "Yeah I'm probably not doing this right"
Do you think Root Touch Up or Just for Men would work better on pubes?
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