If she didn't want me to pass out in her bathroom, then she shouldn't have such a furry rug in there
My dick has been asking about u. He said he didn't do anything wrong n I'm a dumbass
I just saw someone marching around outside wearing only a loincloth, dragging a fuckton of sheet metal. Spring has Sprung.
I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
if the best thing you can say about him is "he probably wont kill me" you may want to rethink hanging out with him
You didn't know it was a gay bar until the 7th guy rejected you. You were crying because you thought it was just a bad night. No more for you.
Just showered now I smell like berries instead of shame
Wrestling for my wallet turned into us almost having sex in the middle of the hallway
Did you miss the part about my hangover needing a day to rest?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The last time I went to Vegas and the sun started to rise, my copilot went home with her nipples pierced.
Your ability to whip out your dick and take a pic anytime I text you is startling.
Got really high to see my fist college experience unfold. Too high to find my classroom but I found the McDonald's down the street
So I ate half a jar of mayo because I thought it would cure a hangover. I thought wrong.
He says it takes a lot to subdue the urge to just bury his face in my vagina. Of course, I have absolutely no problem with this.
Shut up. I hate you. We're doing shots tomorrow. Fuck the consequences.
Randomize