I miss him.. What the hell did I get myself in to? I guess it will get better with time.
No. Just liquor. Time's no good.
hapi new year, hope this year brings u happiness and lots of sexi people ;)
stop writing like that.
This guy legit just tried to LSAT formal logic his way into my pants. Contrapositives and everything.
He's got a wife and three kids but I'm into being that mistake.
He said in a slur "I go so hard, even when I..." and cut himself off by projectile vomiting all over the ice luge.
Fuck your 100 proof Hot Damn. Do you know what 100 proof vomit tastes like? Anger.
These fuzzy pants work great for sleeping, taking an exam, getting baked and watching the hobbit. I guess i'm not changing pants for 72 hours.
You told your mom that it was your second day sober. I think she believed it until you jumped off the balcony
They were arguing about who would hit the piñata first so naturally you tore it open with your hands. You broke the piñata and their hearts.
I woke up on his couch and my bra was flung across the floor and filled with animal crackers
Idk my boobs are big but i dont think theyre hide a flask in them big..
MY GOD WHY DIDN'T I TAKE PHOTOS OF HIS CREDIT CARDS WHILE HE WAS SLEEPING
I walked past his mum on the way out and she offered me toast in a napkin "for my travels". Being home from uni is weird.
i looked that guy up on facebook. the one who went down on me for two hours
what's the verdict
i've been scrubbing my vag all morning
wait you like me?? for my personality??
I know I was surprised too
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