Tell him to shut up cuz i said so. I lost my dollar shoe :(
I think I saw a glimmer of recognition, but she must not have been able to make me out through all of her whorishness.
And Anthony pissed on himself at the strip club
How come the only thing we can do right in our lives is drugs?
I just remember getting him back by licking the window on his truck.
the only way to explain how i feel is someone rolled me down a big fucking hill and then a dog came a took a huge ruthless shit in my mouth at the bottom
We make out exclusively when we're drunk. That's like a relationship for me, right?
How was the rest of your night?
A little fuzzy and a lot naked.
When you give the bridesmaid toast someday at my wedding I need you to quote Ricky Bobby in some form. And slip in your sister has the vagina of awesomeness. That is all.
I woke up spooning with a broom that someone taped a mustache too..i need to stop starting my nights by drinking "hangover" wine.
Officially drug you out of White Castle last night by the hood on your sweatshirt after you cussed out the attendant and stole the satisfaction guaranteed sign because they were closed!
And then we felt it necessary to continue drinking for another 4 hours, yikes
Peanut butter fills the cracks of my heart
You are free to stop by. I promise to keep my penis in my leather pants
Maybe the "i killed someone" and "tequila makes my clothes come off" comments freaked him out.
Im drinking a CAN of bud light at the bar. Do you really think I care anymore?
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