I woke up, not remembering how or when or why i was even there and looked over to find Steph spooning with an adult black man.
Threesome last night. Not that cool, you tend to pick a favorite.
How are you going to pay for strippers in Vegas when you were just begging for McDoubles?
People were autographing me. I'm like the spring break yearbook
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
seeing an 80 year old woman puke in the bushes changes everything...
that's spring break in florida for ya
LA Sucks. The only way i can get laid is if i tell people im at a law firm that represent film producers.
And when they figure it out, they act like IM shallow.
we couldnt tell if he was gay so we started working glee quotes into the conversation to see if he noticed.
Finally put clothes on I've been laying naked in the bed for approximately 4 hours since I showered and by showered I mean when I laid down in the bathtub with the shower on
She blew me in the back of the cab while eye of the tiger was on the radio. Top five all time automatically
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
LOOK AT MY HAIR, DOES THIS LOOK LIKE THE HAIR OF A PERSON WHO HAS HER LIFE TOGETHER?
dude she got out of bed and definitely took a shit then checked her stomach out in the mirror and whispered "well that probably took off five pounds"
I just woke and boke and made apple pancakes. I'm kicking Monday in the dick.
Dude mama brought home the bacon, i got his HBO account i guess that makes up for his by par skills in bed.
After all this I still can't spell gonorrhoea without autocorrect
God damn. You sleep with one 40 year old married dude and suddenly you have “daddy issues”. Fuck all of you.
Randomize