i just got fired from my job because i was "too smart" and my immedate response was i am WAY too stoned to be considered smart, and theni walked out the door.
wow. i have no words.
The duggars are the reason premarital sex is ok. Because if you don't have it until marriage you have no self control when it happens. And 19 kids.
Then he told me he was 40. I'm not sure if I have enough Daddy issues to go for it
Sorry, can't come over. I have to spend time with my niece. Her Dad ignores her and I don't want her to have male attention issues like you.
Even tho I saw his penis. He is still a really nice guy.
just saw a guy driving a atv down the highway in a tux.... only in Iowa...
So I just bought underwear that says "I'm taken." Just know that when I cheat on my bf with you, that's what I'm wearing
gave you a haircut while you slept. Please don't kill me.
I'm considering failing out of my last semester of college just so I can keep fucking him.
I have a huge gash on my chin. Did I get it from A) a mini siezure; B) an oral sex incident; C) Slamming it into a ledge or; D) all of the above?
She came to the party dressed as slutty elmo and then called me oscar the grouch for not wanting to bang her in the dumpster outside.
she is way to in-touch with her childhood
Had mirculous sex while watching miracle. Until she got mad that I kept quoting the movie. Not my fault I'm a good multi-tasker
Do you believe in miracles?
Hooked up with a 20 year old. Only reason I did was cos I thought he was 18
You have a husband. I have a bag full of electronics. This, is the single life.
Oh BTW the next time I see you I don't care where we are your dick will be going into some part of my body.
Randomize
