I feel miserable, can't drink that much when I go out
We've been saying that since '98
she said, and i quote, "i want to black out with my rack out"
It was just a squirrel
You act like its normal to see a squirrel in the bar
she tends to only attract lesbians and homeless men
the question is "speedos?" and the answer is "yes".
google maps should a have a setting for this. like I AM ABANDONING EVERYTHING TO MEET A GIRL WHO IS 10 HOURS OF MILES AWAY. HOW DO WE DO THIS OPTIMALLY?
Just saw a man in a motorized chair roll by drinking a beer. It's 9:45 AM. I love Louisiana.
I tried to walk home in my heels. And I fell into a snow bank. And then I cried and a policeman came up to me and said I can't sit in a snowbank and got me a cab. So maybe that's where I left my credit card. I remember the cop asking me if I was old enough to drink, too. OMG. How embarrassing. Pretty sure I told him to "leave me alone."
Is it a bad thing for a seven year old to call one an alcoholic? Asking for a friend..
I'm not real sure what dinosaurs sound like, but dude, she made dinosaur noises.
All the movies on cable here are either porn or Bollywood. I am never leaving this hotel.
he told me that I'm basically going to be the mom of the house when they move in...i like to see it as being a MILF without the responsibility of real children
I assure you, it was not a Porn Hub Bee Movie parody.
He talked me out going to the bar. No one ever talks me out going to the bar..this is fucking love.
How’d it go?
I accidentally joined a cult
So not great...
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