All I've ever wanted to do in life is right
Maybe you should learn how to spell write first
I have a feeling that after last night, i'm not just going to hell. i'm going to hell on a full scholarship. free admission bitches
and pubic hair rears its ugly head again
Call me in 2 minutes and go along with what I say. You're hysterical and I must go comfort you asap. He just asked if I was ready to experience sex with a wizard and he wasnt kidding.
There's nothing more uncomfortable than drifting into sexual fantasies on a roadtrip and realizing you have a boner with three other dudes in the car.
I hit a bug from across the room with my flip flop boomerang style. That awesome.
We are not in the same countries and I heard about your hook up last night BEFORE you.
After we fucked he shhhh'd me and said your welcome
Using the salt from a pretzel bag for tequila shots. Come over.
Who is he, asking me if im dtf without a question mark
...
I'm rearranging all my life goals to become a billionaire by 28 and batman by 30. Not kidding.
be right there i have to get my cape
SOMETIMES YOU HAVE TO BLAST VANESSA CARLTON IN YOUR CAR AT MIDNIGHT TO FEEL AGAIN. IDK.
I miss my bedroom and my bed and being able to spray myself with my choice of 15 different perfumes so I don't have to wake up to the smell of my past sins
I'm fucking my way through California and it's kind of fun.
Randomize
