But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
So I woke up today with someone's door knob in my pocket. I hope everbody else got out of the house ok.
I've decided I'm peeing in a solo cup then throwing it on his windshield. It's official. He called the cops 4 times in our first week at the house. He deserves it, right?
Porch rule of tonight: when you sing, you must use "something" as a microphone. The person to use the most "creative" object gets the door prize...so far Stephie is winning with Jennifer's dog.
I think that's mostly how we became friends.
Well that, and your desire to put your penis in me.
Found your counterpart from cali. Walked into the bar we were in with milk and a donut, ordered a beer and said anything his group wanted was on his tab....dangerous
I just woke up under my desk. Not to worry though, no one is in the office yet
Let's be honest, I am pretty sketchy looking.
The problem I'm having with looking for jobs while drunk is reading is really hard
His roommate walked in then asked "well did you at least finish". What a way to start your birthday
How's Vegas?
Woke up with a sculpture of my own head. Been trying to find Ashley for two days. so pretty not too bad.
I apologize for using the phrase "monster cock hentai porn shit" to describe that guy I picked up last week.
HIS DICK IS GLORIOUS AND I WANT TO RIDE IT TO VALHALLA
My dad is sitting where you rode me
I ran into the marine at the grocery store. Its like my vag and his penis have this way of finding each other when I least want it.
Randomize
