If you don't sleep with him after showing him your thong with the bow, I am no longer on your side.
Dude, she's just using you for your money, and Cavs tickets.
Honestly, what else do I have going for me?
You make a valid point.
For some reason, my father is not responding to the 5 texts I sent him that all read: "Dad dad dad dad dad dddaadd dddddaaaaaaaaad dad".
On the one hand, she would be the biggest mistake of my year. On the other hand, she's here and drunk.
i can't decided whether the fact that her nipples are bigger then her palms is a problem or not
There is nothing like getting stoned and spying on people with binoculars
she was masturbating to a video of herself masturbaing. She's a keeper
Also, the drinking age in Japan is 20. At what point in the sky am I allowed to start downing alcohol?
They showed a guy on tv in a Brady jersey and a sweatpants boner when the NE offense took the field. They didn't show his face. I hope that wasn't you.
I'll be there soon. I expect Advil and a bucket of kittens when I arrive.
Yepp, I had to be the one to explain that the girl who was slapping people in the face with a dildo was my drunk girlfriend.
I can't believe i just offerred a guy a burrito and head, and got turned down. Officially celibate now.
You tried paying your tab with the coaster
i woke up between my boyfriend and his sister and i don't know if we fucked or cried together
i'd like to schedule a penis for 4pm please.
Randomize
