All I remember is saying that "fire will make it all better"
she got pretty angry when i tried to superglue her fingers together.
Confirm for me that it's be a bad idea to sleep with the 50 year old that's currently hitting on me?
It starts with an S and ends with arah just gave me a bj.
You blacked out and walked in on my neighbor breast feeding at 3am yelling "where is my best friend". I think we should go apologize.
it's been dubbed the summer of antibiotics
You obviously dont comprehend the level of insane i operate at
If I interpreted our horoscopes correctly...you should be coming home with an 8 ball. Just saying.
You don't have a penis so I'm not texting you at this hour. This is penis texting hour only.
They won't let us do straight shots of 151 since that guy lit his face on fire.
She said our goal is to fuck in every bathroom at the reception which is at a country club. I will have the best wedding date ever! Were 4 for 4 in public.
The only thing that got rode last night was the shit face train. I brought him home to see wht all the hype was about and he just started crying and puking in my bathroom.
Still trying to figure out where I was when someone broke the lawn chair and put it in the bathroom.
He was dressed as the 420 Easter bunny...he looked like a walking anti-drug campaign.
Well, let's just say, I got that eye patch like we were joking about