Think about all of the events that have led to this: me sitting in the back of my classroom drinking beer out of a taco bell cup, telling the teacher I have to leave early to go to an AA meeting.
Barsexuality is the new black.
I don't know. The next thing I remember we were in the walmart parking lot making out.
is it sad that whenever i need to spell "independent" i still sing that one rap song?
And then I chipped his tooth because I got too into it. Helloo, single life.
Just walked by a group of guys calling out walks of shame with a mega phone from their front porch.
she won't take no for an answer... no matter what language i said it in
booty call hours are between 1:30-3:00 AM thurs-sat with the exception of major drinking holidays and election days. please try again
Gonna send a picture of my negative pregnancy test with the message "Merry Christmas" to the guys I've been sleeping with. That alone, will put a huge dent in my shopping list of gifts for people.
Girl, that was the lost night of 2012 for me and I have buried that night deep deep away..
Next time she asks for a ride to her "cousins" house and it turns out to be a booty call we're charging her for each mile.
nana can keg stand better than me. should i be proud?
WAIT MOM THIS DOESNT NEED TO BE A FAMILY EVENT OK AARON DOESNT NEED TO BE AROUND FOR NIPPLEGATE 2014
My manager caught me going taking a nap in an empty room. Apparently she sleeps there too.
Ahhh, the bane of our relationship.... His mediocre penis
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