you fell asleep during kickboxing this morning
how does that even happen??
glow-in-the-dark stars on his ceiling from '98 totally make blowing him more romantic.
making an appointment with student health services to check out my pinkeye on 4/20. they are going to thing this is such a joke
no, literally. he fb chatted me and said "since you're online i figured we could bang tonight?"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there's a guy pushing a keg up the street in a shopping cart. you have to love graduation
Just had the weirdest flashback. Did we buy melon, take it into the restaurant and try to make them give it to us as dessert?
The great thing about vietnam is that if I'm drunk during the day people just think I'm being white
Umm... How do I tell my roommate someone shot a speargun through the wall? On a side note, cliff shot a speargun for the first time.
She is still a psychotic unstable bitch, and is therefore PERFECT drinking game fodder
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just got assigned a beer bong as hw in fluids to demonstrate the inverse of pascals principle. I love this prof
I have to shower first, I forgot I peed on my feet last night...
I bet Billy Ray Cyrus wishes he had pulled out now....
My legs feel like baby dolphins
I'm like a bad decision making factory. I need to sit down and have a chat with my decision making elves.
Birthday wine tasting got super shambly super quickly. I am covered in cuts/bruises/terrible life decisions.
Randomize