I'm just sayin. Is it sad that I spent my last dollar on a hamburger just to get a paper bag to huff out of?
Well someone named our apartment "the eiffel tower" on facebook check-in so I think they know..
I just met the neighbor hes a self proclaimed coke dealer/ softporn producer.
It's been decided..lingerie is an investment. You get free breakfast and cab rides out of it.
Been home for 3 days and already spiked coffee with Kahlua. Only 106 till we go back to school
Just spent 15 minutes trying to save the life of a fruit fly that dive-bombed my coffee. I figured it doesn't make sense to let two souls die in this place...
I'm sorry I peed on your everything.
I'm hoping that by this time next year we will be smoking some weed at a gay wedding, asking "Mitt who?"
I just found out that order of 30 Beefy 5-Layers last weekend has achieved legendary status among the Taco Bell employees. Is there a Stoner Achievement for that?
Seriously, she had fingers that made me thank a god I don't even believe in that I'm gay.
The only reason I can fathom that you've been able to continue to date new people this long is that women continue to become of age each year, and the younger ones don't know any better.
So do I get to ride the beginning of the November stache or what?
He just texted me asking for his shirt back and I said I didn't have it and then I ran into him 5 minutes later while wearing the said shirt
Drinking wine while working. Yay.
Just had sex at the YMCA.
We are so productive today.
Why are there naked heterosexuals in my apartment?
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