so i had sex last night with my 12th partner, but hes number 1 for my first time using a condom. i think im finally learning.
look out your window.... he's holding his iphone up like a boombox playing you beach boys
she is like cheap alcohol. you can only get so buzzed before you get sick.
I tried carrying you from the bathroom to your bed and you begged me to bring the toilet too
is he the 3rd person to bang everyone in our group?
I don't know what you're talking about but its dick galore in the tub. We will be getting poked tonight. Bring forks.
You had us pull over so you could pee, you proceeded to pee in some random persons front yard while yelling "im not ashamed"
We got Pizza Hut & Papa Johns, delivered within seconds of each other, and both delivery people did a shot. I was put on Earth for this moment.
I don't remember but we shouldn't have a problem. Unless drunk you encouraged drunk me not to wear a condom.
I think we have a problem.
Got cut off last night cuz this chick had her hands down my shorts and was blatantly playing with my dick while I was trying to order. apparently that's "frowned upon"
I can't believe we really went to walgreens to use their cork opener, bounced and drank a bottle of wine in a sketchy corner...
We have to do it Saturday and get a thirty. If i remember correctly it takes me 12 beers to become a wizard
Just laying in bed, snuggling my cat, and pondering whether I'd like to attend a swingers party this evening...
Is it bad if I look at someone i dont know and just want to punch them in the face?
This girls ass literally just fell out of her jeans in front on me on the escalator. Going commando on a Monday morning is a bold move.
Randomize
