Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
some guy just pulled a dress out of a fax machine...I have no idea what the hell is going on
we went through the mcdonalds drive through and you asked for a free sample of their fries to see how you liked them.
Just tried to fight the dj at cowboys because he would'nt play freebird. Pick me up now.
if we break up, who will get the dealer?
I just got while a charlie horse while orgasming...most confusing feeling ever...
Afterwards she kept poking it and saying "it looks so sad and small" I dont know if I wanted to reach this state in our relationship...
Winner winner, chicken dinner. I am the sole survivor of the orgy without strep. Or maybe I was the carrier?
Using the balance in my bank account I just calculated how many fifths of vodka I can buy this year. Don't let me buy food, all my money is reserved for alcohol
You called me to pick you up from the bar at 9:00. When we drove over the speed bumps you put your hands in the air and pretended you were on a roller coaster.
Is it normal that every guy I hook up with tells me my hair is sexy as it's happening? Like that can't be normal
He gave me the choice between a threeway with his best friend or a tiny turtle. Unfortunately I chose the threeway.
How do you explain to your kids that you met their mother well you were giving her a gynecological exam??
Is she still on a quest to lick every stranger that enters the bar, or have the restraining orders reached critical mass?
These freshmen are fun! The redhead wants to practice her blowjob skills with me and let me rate different moves!
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