i make out with random ppl when i drink he shouldnt feel special
left comments onEVRY SINGLE1of my posts n status updates.Im done dating freshmen
she kept peeing on everything and yelling it was now her property.
So you plan on doing double washing machine sex? Like. A double date. But with sex. On a washing machine..?
yeah we were the ones eating jello shots out of the back of a jeep in the bar parking lot
you should have seen it. it was just a bunch of guys in togas chanting the username and password to a brazzers account we all share. best thing that has happened to our group
pretty sure I just got a "sorry I have a new boyfriend" blow job. Confused, but totally ok with it.
You told her that she shouldn't be allowed to wear clothes then when her roommate asked if you like her you said "no I just want to insert things into her"
I stand by it.
When he was fat he reminded me of my high school best friend and I just wanted to hug him and hug him. Also, he's funny and humor is the fastest way into my pants after Doctor Who and liquor.
Sorry. Not doing life today. Love to. But can't.
SEX BINGO!
Canadian or clown?
The night is not complete until I am drnk and speaking to inanimate objects
we had a "who's sex playlist is better?" fight.....
YOU JUST GOT OUT OF THE HOSPITAL AND YOU'RE ALREADY DRINKING?!
He started out in my roommates bed and by the end of the night was in mine, not sure how that went down. But he left happy in the morning.
Randomize
