Do you think Capital One would let me put the Tub Girl picture on my Capital One card?
Beat you to it.
You know your in college when you decide house chores with games of beer pong...
Just so we both are on the same page, I have no solid plans as to where I'll be sleeping tonight.
we are cloud gazing and there is one that looks like a giant baby riding a dolphin and smoking a joint
i wish there was a reasonable explanation for why this reminds me of you
im trying to stop thinking of him and his amazing dick. every time i do i snap myself with a rubber band. classical conditioning at its finest...and you said i wouldnt learn anything from psychology.
i love all of you. Physical. Emotional. Mental. All of it. When we speak i feel like a feather or a dragon depending on the conversation ...
I think my goal for this black wed is to not scream at an off duty state cop in a bar after trying to flirt with him. No need to make that an annual tradition
Your first mistake was not throwing your beer at the RA and running
Some guy just ordered at Cosmo and 2 screwdrivers in the sky club at 8:30 am. I'm starting to feel a lot better about my alcoholism
I can't believe you didn't come out. There was a duckling ON THE BAR!
Just jacked in the family restroom in the hospital while eating beef jerky and looking at reddit gone wild.
Liar. My heart is broken and my boobs are disappointed.
YOU LICKED MY MAKEUP OFF.
I'm going to get drunk, come back, call my grandma, and eat all those scrambled eggs.
I'm with the cops, Trish's gay husband stabbed himself and is framing her for attempt of murder and I'm dressed 4 the club I'm wearing leather pants leather jacket leather boots and black club top. Embarrassed
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