Your kinda stuck between a rock and his hard dick on this one..
I'm making you a bingo card for hookups of the school year 2011-12 so you can make even worse life decisions next year
Also, I threw up on the playground again. I've honestly had more fun there this past summer than I did in my entire childhood.
So the drug dealer I'm sleeping with just got drugs from the other drug dealer I'm sleeping with
Isn't life beautiful?
I'm pretty sure when you walk down Broadway and can pick out people you've slept with.. It might be a problem. I'm leaving for rehab tomorrow.
I'm pretty sure I had my drunk fortune told by a gay Miss Cleo last night. At least it's advice sober me can agree with.
Are you high?
The snorkel mask makes that pretty clear
Today has been like a snow day for your boobs. No rules, just doing whatever they want.
there's an entire drinking game devoted to nobody liking her face
I'm hiding in the bathroom at the library but there are children here I just want to drunk cry in peace
In an unrelated matter, im gonna eat you out so much later.
Guess who has two thumbs and broke her boyfriends dick?
I was at a crossroads, dude. Like, do I wanna eat chicken McNuggets or talk about my feelings?
hahahaha classic. this is why you are going to a college with a hospital right next to it
He has fairy lights round his bed.. And played Jamie cullum when we had sex... Hes batting for the other team right?
Randomize
