Is that you in the white hat?
Fine suit yourself
She threw up all over when she was giving me dome. Not even gonna lie, it felt really good.
He's sobering up. It was really bad for like 45 minutes. He cried while telling me how he pictured us eating hotdogs on the beach together.
I'm over this relationship. I'm just going to get drunk all day, wake up in a puddle of my own vomit again, and go on with my life
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She's trying to feed the TV fried rice and screaming "FRIED RICE AND TEARS". Please bring me more booze.
The hot guy sitting next to me in the lib is reading a book called "Impersonal sex in public places." How wrong would it be to give him my number when I bounce?
Oh Brad. Your poor brain, always being ignored for your penis and crazy women.
We can't BOTH have terrible sex lives. Get fucked or throw him out.
Either that or he's gagged in a strangers trunk right now.
Well I suppose either way he's learning a pretty tough lesson right now.
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as much bud light as i have consumed over the years budweiser should give me a clydesdale
I don't know, we got really drunk and I slapped her with an ear of corn.
The guy next to me on the bus has one hole in his jeans that has over 20 mini dicks drawn on his leg. Classic.
You woke up at like 4 in the morning fell off your bunk bead, yelled at Nic for asking if you were ok, walked to the kitchen, pissed on the keg, and then looked at me and said "Still not worth it" then went back to bed.
Maverick's sitting in jail wearing a turkey costume and I am soooo jealous.
You have GOT to stop kicking in his kitchen door. Just wait for him to open it next time.
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