6 figure salary? he just got a little cuter.
I don't really want to explain to you right now but i just ate laundry detergent
We're cuddling on the couch that me and his brother had sex on...this feels wrong
You know were out to late when I call my hook up at 8:08pm and 8:08am in the same night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
oh and i'm sorry i sold you for three cigarettes last night
I want him to come over and snuggle with me but put a bag over his head. Is that rude?
It's not rude if you use a pillowcase that's softer.
Why do the people I hook up with still exist after we're done?
He won't sleep with me again until I commit...
Run. There is other dick in the sea, less clingy dick.
Saturday evening, however, will be my vodka and bubble wrap extravaganza.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like the devil is trying to impregnate me through my eyeballs.
i don't remember going ever taking off my pants but my pubes are shaved into a K and kelsey is passed out in the shower.
Also I've come to learn that "type" and "fetish" are different things. Apologies for earlier confusion.
He woke up & asked where his pants were then asked where he was then asked who I was. Been married 20 yrs. He was drunkest ever.
U just kept yelling her vagina wasn't a priority bc u had a bowl of cheerios calling your name
Planning a vacation around my dog. I have become one of those dog moms.
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