Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
dude, never take two tylenol pm and smoke three bowls. i feel like i'm covered in cold ants.
I haven't had nearly enough lesbian experiences to fully commit to this relationship.
Whoever decided it was a good idea to sell 40's at a bar with life-sized jenga deserves a nobel prize.
idk, it started getting weird when they were looking up videos of lesbian giraffes
We had to go to his parents last night for dinner & ended up having a quickie in the bathroom while everyone else was outside smoking.. This is why we have a successful marriage.
You can wear my underwear. It'll be like old times.
I thought I was pretty much sober now but then I realized I've been eating scrambled eggs with my hands...
Hey are you going to the pride parade? If so get me a shit ton of condoms
He pointed at me, then leaned in and said "shes the best at blow jobs" then chris fist pumped him and said "dude, I know"
he's like a horny 3rd grader on cocaine. he needs a leash
Now I just sit back and wait to give ass birth to pure evil.
Umm...sounds like a maybe. I broke my nose and have surgery next wed but if I'm ok by Friday I'm down.
He kept saying "Welcome to Indianapolis" over and over while we were having sex...because that's his hometown. I was scared and confused... I didn't know if I should have said thank you or what.
Randomize
