oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
he showed me his boner with his cell phone light during the movie.
Superbowl and Mardi Gras a week apart. World's longest bender here I come.
You two were too busy to notice that his used condom landed on me when he threw it.. Thanks.
He was pretty out of it. He heard crickets outside, and thought it was the laptop. So he put his ear to it, rubbed the keyboard, and said "tell me your secrets."
we just got kicked out of the mexican restaurant. i have a full pitcher of margarita's hiding under my coat.
He showed up drunk to my cousions HS grad party, we stayed at the bars till 2, then he got up at 5 to run a half marathon and by the time I woke up wlhe was already back and drinking.
I think I wrote "thanks for the free alcohol!!!" in their wedding guest book and I'm almost positive I signed my name
i was drinking at the bar last night with a guy with no bottom teeth, wearing zubas and a polka dotted hat. if that isn't the definition of wisconsin, i dont know what is
I don't give a damn about what he wants to do with his life. Personalities are for pussies.
Just because im a good person doesn't mean that I don't reserve the right to be a complete dick about it.
Then he texted me that I was the "good kind" of fat.
I put on pants and a bra for you and you never showed up. There is no forgiveness for that.
I think someone shaved off all their pubes in the handicap stall or a werewolf stopped by the office to take a crAzy dump!
I just described cereal to my mother as "acoustic breakfast soup".
who is this
Randomize
