Alright folks.. i have made history - I just hit my 2nd PARKED car SOBER withing 6 months.. :*( wtf?!
Me too. I'd like to spend all next summer high and drunk and riding ponies and boys.
Just watched a porn with the dvd commentary on i think i need to re-evaluate my life
I love seeing the creepers that friend request me outside of facebook. its like seeing a unicorn in the middle of campus.
operation have a gay friend backfired
It involved anal and pop rocks. Tell me how that could have ended well.
The usual, bring face make up, I have a weird gash on my nose, probably from my one night stand
I sat down next to him and my bra just unhooked itself
I'm using my dog as a pillow. He's cool with it.
Got stuck at my fwb place for three days because I decided sex was more important than my safety in the weather. Worth it.
What are the chances I get my period 2 weeks early just as welcome week starts. My uterus is conspiring with my dead catholic grandma
I just watched videos of people getting puppies and crying, I cried too. Definitely still drunk
I always felt my time would come in the form of a tidal wave of whisky
Of fucking course I get my period on Valentine's Day...
She's throwing a party for a guy that just got out of rehab?
Randomize
