i knew it was time to break up with him once he pulled out the Halo foreplay costumes
I said I wanted my dignity back. He brought my thong to me after sharpie-ing "dignity" on the front. I'm not sure if I should me mad or impressed.
I had a dream last night that I had sex with Abe Lincoln. I must stop watching the History Channel before I go to bed.
And on top of all this... he just told me to "chill my nips."
i really care about you, respect you, another gay word, and another gay word... lets just drink
yep you were here saturday. if you woke up smelling like vanilla i can explain.
Medically speaking as your gynecologist and your girlfriend, that is not a rash.
And we're breaking up
Nothing better than going to Mass on Easter Sunday with "I love penis" henna tattooed across your back. Love your Indian culture.
I will be there. invited or not. I go where the pancakes go.
I made out with about ten people last night. And four of them were just on the way to my car from the bar. And one was my roommate.
I'm going to pretend you don't watch My Little Pony and focus on your large cock. Kay? Don't bring it up again.
I feel like ditching all logic and responsibility and get shit-faced before the week's over. Thoughts?
DUDE!!!!! THERE IS A MIDGET HANDING OUT RICE KRISPIE TREATS!!!!!! WHERE ARE YOU WHEN THE COOL SHIT GOES DOWN???????
No dude shes like 5 feet tall and maybe 100 pounds... Normally i wouldnt be scared but someone gave her a bat. Thats why im in the bathroom
It's weird having sex with someone you actually like
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