Operation extremely regretful is in full effect
my house keeper must think I'm a prostitute.
Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
she was using a pencil to fish crushed adderall out of a plastic bag. it was like a college version of fun dip
It's really too bad Cosmo doesn't have "What To Do When You've Drunkenly Sucked His Dick and He Doesn't Text You Back" article.
All I did this weekend was get my life in order. I feel like I wasted my time.
He came in 20 minutes late for his final wearing plastic bags on his feet, and a tablecloth cape. Explain.
That's the point dumbass, I can't use my boss as a reference cause they'd have to fucking call him in prison.
Just put an ad on Craigslist for a fake groom... I'm sure only non creepy sane people will respond to it
Vegas is great, yelled at a guy 4 lanes over if he wanted a bj. ended up having sex in a vacant lot. I think he was homeless.
My roommate told me he found me naked in the shower puking and when he asked why I was naked I said "you can't wear clothes in a shower"
For a guy who came before his dick was out of his pants, he gave surprisingly good head.
I was at a crossroads, dude. Like, do I wanna eat chicken McNuggets or talk about my feelings?
he just got here with a handle of tequila and box of condoms. looks like i'll be spending the weekend in bed
Gov of Georgia is going to allow massage therapists to return to work.
Gives a new meaning to 'Happy Endings'.
Randomize
