Greg found me on xtube. Who knew random hook ups would leave their web cams on and upload it. At least it shows off big penis.
i feel like the song jizz in my pants was made for him.
you opened the fridge, pissed on the food, fell over, then threw up on yourself. thats whats all over the kitchen.
i just woke up to 15 people singing a whole new world
Just got arrested at PF changs. Happy New year, China
Nyquil jello-shots aiding in health and happiness
about 90% sure I fell off a roof. It hurts BAD. Don't suppose you're still in town?
yup haha I infact DID fall off a roof. Want some bomb ass omlettes?
It's ok. Rob's just shotgunning upside down.
nah, they dropped the charges. apparently ripping his junk when he tried to hop the fence seemed like punishment enough...
I went from looking for a bong to home decor in a 10 minute span. This is what being an adult is all about!
It was a frighteningly large penis to say the least
He asked me to come stay with him so he could "see that ass and watch Harry Potter."
I went to a party last night....I stole all of their ornaments and the toaster oven.
What's rude is him not accepting my blowjob offer. What kind of guy denies that.
last night I mixed vodka in with my protein shake... and you tell me my new years resolution was impossible
Randomize