Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
maybe i'll see you again later :)
I'd rather shit a knife.
But I love Penises too much to give up on them. My phone capitalized Penises. It's like it knows I respect them
Hey. Hope youre not too hungover. Also, did you put a Christmas tree in my guest bathroom and cover it with condoms?
The guy who was The Count on Sesame Street died this week too. Therefore, you should take multiple shots, count them, & go "ahh aaahh aaaahhh" after each one. I expect video...
I am playing a little game I like to call "How Quickly Can I Infuse This Vodka Into My Bloodstream Without the Use of an IV"
You said "bag of dicks" before passing out and falling off the landing
Oh god... Please tell me Sarah didn't see me like this
...you may have kinda punched her in the tit on the way down...
Metaphysical thesis on the illusion of self+ 2 day adderal binge = the walls of reality are crumbling
There was a deer right in front of me when I came. Sex in the forest is awesome
I just accidentally deep throated a popsicle in front of my parents
Maybe they'll dismiss me from jury duty after they smell beer on me. You can't keep me in a cage and then give me an hour and a half long lunch break next to a beer fest and expect sobriety.
I know you're having some issues right now but can we focus on the gangbang?
After the bar we stopped to Meijer where I found myself singing little mermaid while rubbing a pack of hotdogs on my face..
Most people would agree that it IS in fact slutty to give someone head for free ice cream.
We took three cabs to get home, the first one dropped us off a block away, so we went back to the hotel and tried again
Randomize
