after the cops left he pulled the weed out of his ass and we smoked it
I just made what I can safely estimate to be a 900 calorie pb&j. Fuck a serving size.
Puking green right now......... jaimison mcflurry very bad idea
hahaha lucky. I'm fishing with some dude I just met when I woke up next to the mohawk river
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Walking through campus with a grocery bag full of pot brownies. I'm like the santa claus of 4/20
I have one of those hangovers where you visualize how awesome it would be to climb in your fridge and drink glacier water
She's on her way over to shave my year round sweater vest into a festive argyle sweater vest. Keeper?
Also he didn't buy condoms after we ran out last week. Luckily I had one, but I told him he should be more optimistic about getting laid
I was passed out in a bathroom stall. Of course im going to look like shit
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My mother is a bitch. She just outed me to my dad. He wants to meet you by the way...
Holy shit, add "successfully got stoned secretly at a party where a cop was" to my list of accomplishments.
The chances of me making out with someone next weekend are about the same as me not remembering it.
I'm pretty sure that my eyebrow is going to be swollen from a sex injury tomorrow and possibly a black eye. If it forms that way it wiil be the second time. Different eyeball. Different decade.
Between falling off a shelf on to a concrete floor and sex with you - i may never walk again.
I got here. Mom yelled "drink of the day is blueberry sangria" and next thing I knew I was on a slip and slide.
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