I have a walk of shame I should be getting to. "Hey, by the way, what is your name?" is not a conversation I want to have today
on the list of things id be doing when i was almost 30, waiting for a girl to finish shitting the bed wasn't on there.
whatever. i fb stalked him and his pic comments are witty. so i'm going for it.
Just saw someone buying TWO six packs of O'Doul's. WHY ??
we did anal to Party In The USA and he busted to Firefies .. felt like we were fucking in a middle school dance
She's a virgin AND a minister's daughter. We're one schoolgirl outfit from the dear penthouse trifecta
He bought me Ben & Jerrys and then apologized for the fact that he was going to fall asleep before we could have sex
LSHMSFOAIDMT = laughing so hard my sombrero falls off and I drop my taco.
If you could come over after class and poke me with a stick to see if im still alive id really appreciate it
Went to an open-bar law school party and puked in front of Justice Scalia. My legal career is now complete -- I literally got judged by a U.S. Supreme Court Justice. Can't get any higher than that.
In my defense, there are at least three ways to die doing that, and I'm still here. America, Fuck Yeah!
In 18 months of being married we've had sex with 7 different couples. Who said you can't have your cake and eat it.
I used to sleep with a guy on the USA rugby team... He stole my credit card and my Hitman DVD. I'm more upset about the Hitman DVD..
He just got out of surgery, almost died from shooting him self with an arrow.
He's the one named Andrew. In his profile picture he is the one on the right in the monkey costume.
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