I just am on my way home.. i had 3 and one startd crying and puking.. so they went home. one bitch fuckin ruined it for evryone.. u playin cards?
you looked like a weeble wobble. everytime we thought you were going to fall you bounced back up...you're an amazing drunk
I HATE DRINKING WITH JUST GIRLS, ITS 1030 THEYRE ALL HAMMERED AND TALKING ABOUT HOW AWESOME THEIR SHOES ARE!!!!!!!
Oh btw I took the eighth out of the plastic wrap so I could use it to wrap my red pepper. This can be seen as either pathetic or resourceful.
I'm not as easy in Europe as I am in the US
Only because you can wipe your slut slate clean & start anew. It's a little known benefit of our currency exchange.
Just the amount of girls he locked himself in my room woth says your gonna have to take a cab bro. I don't think he's going anywhere
They're tearing apart the house I lost my virginity in:(
It's ok. I will share any beautiful men that I drug and leave unconscious on my bed. I'm that kind of friend.
I put tequila in my salad dressing yesterday. Step the fuck up.
Nothing says "welcome to Denver" like a hot 18 year old giving you directions to the dispensary and ending up blowing you in the backseat
He tried to tip me with his police badge...
and you didn't accept WHY?!
I'm using my ex bfs phone number to look up his Kroger card so I can get a discount on condoms...yep this is my life
I've peed in two sinks in the past two weeks. No one should be able to say that.
Questions: How did Rachel get home? Why did I find both her ID's in my shoes? And does anyone know if she's alive?
What did you give up for lent?
Diet and excersize. And I'm never going back...
Randomize
