in hindsight, $10 Malibu buckets were a terrible idea...
this will be a night to untag.
i'm pretty sure i'm on the same train we took last friday..
what?how do you know?
it appears they have not cleaned up your vomit yet.
Drunkenly auctioned off my bed for 3 tequila shots
By the way, thank you for feeding me fries when I was sitting on the floor.
In preparation of Wine in the Woods next weekend, today we're hosting Straight Vodka in the Bathtub
Some guy just bought a handle of cuervo, a curling iron, and a power drill. Paid with a jar of change. I'm torn between avoiding him and befriending him..
Remember that time we became friends because I shotgunned a Tall Boy in your bathroom?
Those memories are both hazy and awesome.
I told him I wanted to "ride him like a show pony" I think he gets the picture
Tonight just try not to threaten to pee on the hot guys buying us drinks....please..
he congratulated me on my ability to grow long hair after pulling it to see if i had extensions
How bad would it be if I asked him for my "ho ho ho" thong back? They're my fav christmas pair!
The funny part was that the cop pulled us over cause the park was closed, not because I had just come up from giving the guy a blowjob when the cop drove by.
I wrote notes to myself all over my body. "don't yell at cops again" "Cody stole your phone" "you kissed Cody" "vodka shots are bad for your liver" and "cactus pretty" WTF????
Legit hope my Trump humping Brother dies of this shit so I can stop pretending to still love him.
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