I really think my calling is to star in a Live Links commercial
i would totally change schools right now just to be that new girl everyone wants
I don't really know I'm just giving her a key to get back in and the "don't get pregnant speech" and leaving it at that.
i'm sorry, but my penis isnt the solution to your problems
I think "I actually like giving blow jobs better" qualifies her as a keeper
No, she isn't nearly as crazy as the girl who wanted to wear a vial of my semen as a necklace.
I know. But whatever I'll just eat cold pizza and play with my cats by candlelight
Please come home, i don't want to feel like basket garbage girl but I'm in your alleyway and not sure how to change that.
The packers need to win more often, Andrew keeps drunk calling me and confessing his undying love for me in between puking and taking more shots.
so i might have figured out why that girl isn't talking to me...I'm 90% confident I didn't give her a pillow when she stayed over >.>
I think I just smoked a piece of your foot. Were u picking your feet by the weed?
Is this a drinking picnic?
Is there another kind?
there may have been a blood oath never to speak of it again...only reason i can think of as to why there was a 1 inch bloody cut on my right boob
I should get an "I gave blood today" type of sticker, but instead it would say "I went balls deep today"
She kept telling me that it pissed her off that i expect people to make out with me...then she made out with me. Win?
Randomize