its easy. just sleep with a bunch of guys until one falls in love
Well, I fucked her. But the sex wasn't all that great. Morning sex never is
So i told my advisor i had to drop the class bc the prof said "supposably" and "irregardless" within the 1st 10 minutes of the 1st class; she agreed with me that dropping it was the best choice
My mom's mothers day present consisted of a card, chocolate and the rose bush I threw up in as I was getting in last night. She loved it.
There are going to be so many Snookis this Halloween that I might just dress as the guy that hit her and punch them all in the face
He sent me a pic and IT CURVED OUT OF THE PICTURE! Curved. Out. Of. The. Picture.
she was masturbating to a video of herself masturbaing. She's a keeper
That's why I don't chug things. Because when I was a freshman in college tequila came out my nose.
Tell him I'm the girl who was excited he spoke English. Then ask him where he picked me up from.
You meet the best people naked in a hot tub at 2 am.
You don't realize how cold it really is...I poured my bong out the second floor window and icicles hit the ground.
Just saw a dude take a shot in the parking lot in his car. Too early in the semester for that
she has that "i will punish you like your mom did" vibe, i think guys like that.
I just watched your sister pour half a bottle of cotton candy flavored snow cone syrup into a bottle of marshmallow flavored vodka, take a swig, frown, and pour a cherry coke in.
Just wait until she offers you a "powerita"
just passed a kid drinking a beer at 2pm. clearly it's the last day of break.
Randomize
