I'm gonna play a drinking game called "Sarah takes the train"
Why is there 6 cases of kwic trip dounuts dumped in my bed? Best 34 dollar wake up of my life
she told me I give head better than a lesbian. I know it's a great compliment but it kind of threw me off.
the doctor brought back painful memories by lecturing me about your teeth marks that are still on my dick.
There's a 24 hour period after giving head where you can't eat penis shaped food without me laughing at you
ride him like a prized pony all the way to orgasm town.
I mean two cocks this time. Trust me, I'm not gonna pull the same stunts as last time in this situation
I can measure my amount of vomit in solo cups.
One eye has cum in it and the other has sunscreen
summertime
You seriously don't remember crying about how much you miss your mom right before we hooked up?
Dude at the bar last night came into the bathroom, drop kicked the stall open and start saying lines from happy Gilmore as he was shitting, "go in your home! Are you too good for your home?!"
I'M GOING TO FUCK AN ENTIRE ORCHESTRA AND NOTHING CAN STOP ME
The band club does not count as an orchestra
Just watched a guy open his car door, puke, close it, and resume driving. Happy Monday.
Can u pick up some lemons on the way? I have Tequila and a sore throat..I need them for both
I’ve basically been controlling him with my tits for months now, so I can’t even imagine what would happen if I start banging him
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