"You squeeze, we tiip biiiiiig" JB
I got otter pops to cool the beers, it's an all around better idea.
i didnt mean to paint the dog... it just kinda happened
on the way to work, i saw an empty wine bottle sitting in the middle of an intersection. i thought of you.
i can respect that.
It is 8 o'clock in the morning and there is already blood all over one of the stalls in the bathroom. What has your St. Patrick's day done for you?
In case you were wondering, my scare crow is wearing your outfit from last night.
it's been a while because I don't count the hooker
She was mid-sentence and then BOOM the hammock broke off the tree. I about pissed myself. Hot Sprite and Vodka make the world go round.
She made me take my shoes off outside her room but she didn't make me wear a condom. I am confused.
THE CONDOM ONLY COVERS HALF OF HIS DICK I AM IN THE BATHROOM PANICKING
Pretty sure the cab driver can even smell the sex coming from between my legs
im so proud of her that she got shit faced finally. This must be what it feels like to see you kids get their diploma or some shit.
She called it a palate cleanser. She and her friend dike it out once a year before returning to dick
Together or do they pick up? How far do they go? IS AN AUDIENCE PERMITTED? GODAMIT ANSWERS MAN!!!!!!
Next think I knew I was pretty much using his penis as a microphone... No more playing Eminem during hookups
I know you won't see this for awhile, but I had to tell somebody, and you're like the only person who won't judge me for having an accidental erotic encounter with General Tso's chicken.
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