You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
Just tried to fight the dj at cowboys because he would'nt play freebird. Pick me up now.
Do you think I can haggle my way to discounted weed on 4.21?
It's a big world.....someone has to fuck it.
i'm having taco bell mild sauce and tums for breakfast because i'm hungover and thats all i can find. it's like thanksgiving up in here
Thanks for your number, i want to ski with you, do party with you and sleep with you. Lucas.
we should look into getting a golf cart for the weekend. i have a feeling legs wont be a sufficient source of transportation.
I'm not asking you to commit. I'm politely asking your penis to be my friend.
I think that's mostly how we became friends.
Well that, and your desire to put your penis in me.
Shame?!? Shame only comes from getting naked in front of strangers and it not being awesome
Where's Taylor bro?
Never mind found him under the sink
I'm ordering sushi and crying over finals. Come over and bring wine.
He will forever be known as the toe sucker who may or may not have been a father
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
Point in my hangover when I'm honestly not sure if I'm about to puke, or shit my pants.
Randomize
