Bro, I met the coolest hottest chick tonight and she has the hottest friends.
Where are you?
Strip Club
You smell like a Billy Joel song
im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
The tent wall coming unstaked in the wind and hitting me in the face really sobered me up
Would the plural word for douche be deese? "Look at these deese bags"?
Are you high?
He called the drink "The Annexation of Puerto Rico". He wouldn't tell us whats in it but said that we should all fear for our lives. Let's do this.
No, not at all. Pulling a condom out of your vag at 2pm is NOTHING like finding $10 in your winter coat. Stop trying to make me feel better.
New life rule, no banging opera singers. I might be a little deaf now
I need to have some sort of hot sex experience in a mask.
He played with my boobs the whole time we watched Scott Pilgrim and then started invited others to play with them too. It reminded me of how my mom gives out my french fries without asking.
i came outside and he was eating her out on my lawn. i refuse to pick up the dog shit in my yard so i hope he chose the spot wisely
At least you didn't have a hemorroid rupture while banging
We're at an agreement where I don't pry and she pretends blissful ignorance
My liver is going to reject life during Greek Week
How many liver transplants can a person have? Bc you may need a couple
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