The is a pregnant woman in this Chipolte wearing a shirt that simply says ‘OOPS!’ across the tummy.
That baby is bound to be under-loved.
you told the bartender not to open the bottle because you were gonna put it in your purse in case you get cut off later
I want to fuck you with a popsicle till it melts then eat it out of you
Really.
she tried giving me head in the pool. it was more entertaining than pleasurable
dude thats like the second time shes peed on the couch at a party. we cant invite her anymore
we just plugged the camera up to the big screen. would you like to come see what you did last night, in high definition?
I feel like I should lick our pitcher just so everyone knows its ours
I know you claim to have a large penis but I do not believe in what i cannot see. Sort of like god.
Besides asking our teacher if he enjoyed being fisted did I have any other tragic moments last night?
I just had a full choir singing the phrase pudding cup in my head. Too. Stoned.
You decided that walking wasn't in the cards for you anymore
My alarm clock on my phone was changed to Fat Bottom Girls over the weekend, and I just now noticed. I'm actually okay w that after Mardi Gras. Well done, random. Well done.
I need someone to play with my boobs. Even platonically. I just need a good groping
I'm sitting here with a band aid on my labia, this is a first
he offered to let me fuck his brother , of course im marrying him
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