dats a huuuuuge bitch!
who is this????
you definitely made a grilled cheese using your iron..
ya and it worked didnt it??
I'm reciting my presentation (beer in hand) on the porch to a snowmen audience.
This theraflu would make for a great margarita.
I can make a sudafedarita
On 3 separate occasions, she grabbed my bullhorn to announce to the entire party she had fucked me.
She said I told her "I'm to drunk to take your bra off." then she said I walked out completely naked to go watch tv.
We didn't have sex but he is somehow naked and laying on top of me. his dick is touching my leg and freaking me the fuck out.
Yea we slept in ur room but im 80% sure we didnt have any peanut butter in there
You screamed "there will be blood" and punched some random guy in the face. So no, we can't go back to that bar.
I can't keep up with all the guys you're banging. I'm just going to start referring to them by city of origin.
Also not to brag but I got high last night and got us a host family in a chateau in the south of France
I woke up and finished the bottle like a champ
Doing shots with my high school valedictorian. Bucket list
idk what to be more embarrassed/confused about, that i lost my underwear or that i woke up covered in fried rice
So, I can officially cross "getting eaten out in a church confession booth" off my bucket list.
Randomize
