and you said cock pushups were impossible
its good she wears the same dress to all the weddings so we can track how fat she's really gotten
so glad i banged her when she was skinny
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
DONT TAKE THE KEG OUT OF THE HOT TUB I NEED A PICTURE OF ME DOING A KEG STAND ON IT
I feel like my vagina stays drunk longer than the rest of me. It's always super sensitive and hungry the day after drinking.
She said we should all be mermaids since didn't breathe for 9 months inside our mothers. I want her logic.
You were walking around in your swim suit, an open robe, snow boots and a death grip on that handel of captain morgan.
but I'll probably watch some porn later so it's not a complete waste of a Saturday night.
I walked by the two of them and mouthed "fuck me" based on there reaction I think they just came in their pants
I wish our county sheriff had a comment section for their mugshots.
I'm cooling my balls with a beer because I'm too cheap to turn on the AC
this is a PSA to never have sex in a bed from ikea
My sex toys have been held in customs for almost a month now. They're British, what the hell?!?
You just kept looking down at your tits and screaming "I LOVE YOU TWO!!!"
My friend Julia's mom just called her to say she got a puzzle in the mail made of cheese and when she put it together it spelled FUCK YOU and she doesn't know who it's from.
Randomize
