Whats up?
Drunk as a mother trucker with panties on her thumbnail..laying thee down
Stay up. I'm coming home in a little
Ill try..hurry!!!! Thine hour awaits you
it turns out vodka filled condoms arent that funny
Do they fuck in the end of "Lady and the Tramp" or am i just wasting my time
I'm praying to Jesus, Allah, Buddah,and the whole gang tonight that I'm not pregnant
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Have you ever looked at the 750mL bottle of wine on the seat next to you knowing that it's just not going to be enough?
Each and every day.
she told me if people cross their eyes and look at her, they say she looks like megan fox
He went into the alley to piss and came back a minute later with a case of Bud Select. I'm speechless.
Circumcision scars are like fingerprints. I think I'm on to something man.
God you people are gross. Come collect your unconscious friend.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i like feelif swiord YOU ARE A GOD
I have just gotten home. I saw a lot of penis tonight. On a trampoline. Shit got weird.
jen just told me ur idea of revenge was saluting while letting his bong float away while attached to some balloons.
drunk brunch me or lose me forever
Also, I found this app that is basically a tamagochi from the 90's and now I finally have something to keep me busy at work!
My husband is waiting until son is napping and air humps as a seduction tactic. Pray for me.
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