OMg patrick swayze is the sexuest man he is killing me I'm gonna get dehydrated if I don't stop looking at him
Im making the walk of shame with half a box of pizza, its like when youre little and you get a goodie bag leaving the party
Her birthday cake consisted of a shot of tequila with a candle in it
You stuck your head out the window to puke and got hit with a mailbox.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They're like penises that have been put in a blender.
I dont think he stole the pillow. I mean if he wanted a souvenir, my thong was on the nightstand.
Sorry my moustache came off because I was face first in a layered bucket full of jello shots.
for future reference mormans are hard to crack but they give fucking amazing hand jobs.
this is not the first time I've had hot dogs and 151 for thanksgiving.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Going through my purse trying to find money for this cab but all I keep pulling out if chicken from my burrito o ate an hour ago. Help?
Plus now I feel weird sleeping with you. It's like shooting a three legged deer. It's already at a disadvantage and couldn't get what it's full potential deserves.
You threw a handful of caps into a pitcher of Heineken and asked everyone if they wanted to go "bobbing for molly"
Who the fuck gets injured on a merry-go-round? HOW IS IT POSSIBLE??
Was your bare penis on or around my blanket?
You're emotionally mature, right? I said you were.
I have at least four things in my line of sight that have Kermit the Frog on them in my dorm. Does that answer your question?
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