Fyi I let myself into your place, I'm wearing some of your clothes in your bed. Come take them off
Contrary to popular belief, while 19 is an attractive age, it does not equate to sexual prowess.
My goal for the party is to get everyone in a diaper. Reasonable?
Those 2 guys from the sonic commercial will be virgins for life.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Passed out on a playground for a while before trying to break into the elementary school. Erica thought her captain tasted like cat food, so she poured her bottle into her cat's dish and proceeded to eat it like cereal.
You win. Erica always eats cat food.
is it mean to send ur x his condoms back because they are too small for ur new boyfriend?
Man the liquor store just wrong numbered me, its a sign even god wants me to drink
well i did drunkenly flip his snowmobile going 90, so i can kind of see why hes mad
Just re-gained consciousness in the freshman girls dorm. Normally this would be awesome but I'm on the floor surrounded by chicks doing their homework. This makes me uncomfortable but I don't think they know I'm awake yet. If I b-line for the door can you come get me?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's 11am on 4/20 and I'm already in urgent care.
I think I was the only one who knew you were acting like you weren't drunk in public issues discussion this morning. Make sure you thank me in your Academy Award Speech someday.
Hi, my name is Ashslay and I'll be your designated shitshow.
I'm studying. And by studying I mean I am laying on my floor drinking boones farm alone. Last two weeks. Fuck it.
That's it. I'm moving to LA & sitting on his face.
I am rewearing my dress from last night. I only wore it for like two hours before fucking. And I took it off first so no cock contact. This is my new standard of cleanliness.
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