This ginger kid smells like a queef popsicle
I actually had no interest in him until he started talking about his 4 arrests. That made him go from a 5 1/2 to a 8, easily.
there is potential here for me to have a consistent access to someone's dick who isn't actually an asshole. i think i'm ready for a relationship.
i threw up on the table at the pizza place and peed in her room mates closet. i wouldnt invite me back either
He's cute when he's drunk, too. Also he tried to fight my door...
He's nice but I'm a one bouncer kind of girl
I made him an O's fan. One pic of my tits coming out of a Baltimore shirt and it was done.
Why did you fed-x me a peanut butter sandwich?
It seemed like the thing to do. There's popcorn on it too.
STOP smoking sooo much weed. Damn
I'm almost too old to be on The Real World but feel like I'm too young to be on The Bachelor and I'm just really confused with my place in life.
The number of threesomes I have agreed to seems to increase every time I talk to you drunk...
My mom always wanted to raise a classy lady, it just turned out to not be her daughter.
She rode me like a jockey on that tiny couch. Then we spooned.
There's a rash on my genitals that would like a word with you.
Social anxiety problems: I just had to get up and change stalls mid-poop because someone sat down in the one next to mine.
If I'm getting through this pandemic I'm doing it drunk.
Randomize
