That girl would be way hotter if she changed her face.
at what point did you think saran wrap was a better alternative to shoes?
This is final. The chair stays in the bathroom, we are too old to be puking from the floor, grown ups sit in chairs infront of the toilet to puke.
Or grown ups don't drink themselves into vomiting.
Dude I've kinda accepted I may leave Nola with the clap.
I don't know what I would do if cheese never existed
Someone's stooooned
You kept asking the bartender if you could "buy a dollar".
No. 70% of the female population would find them attractive. The other 30% are lesbian and even they would appreciate them for their strong bodies and athletic capabilities.
I think my body is a cloud. This mixture of things is heavenly. Dare was wrong, drugs are awesome.
On another note, I feel like my vagina is slowly being peeled off with a rusty potato peeler.
I feel like I spent all day wearing underpants made entirely of poison ivy and sandpaper
Eh, I don't question what my penis likes. It just does what it does.
I yelled out "blow jobs!" in my macroeconomics class. Ask me more about how my life is spiraling out of control.
Lmao a dude who just got out of prison said im worth 10 cigarettes in prison...I think that's a compliment
Well, I like big penises but it's not like he walks around with it out or anything so yes I think he has beautiful eyes
I think my roomie is silently judging me for spraining my foot by having sex in a bounce house
so the bounce house and tequila was good idea then?
Randomize