Barsexuality is the new black.
i was like hansel and gretel. i puked a trail from mcdonalds to our place so i could find my way back in the morning
you rubbed the head of my dick and said "I shall call you Squishy and you shall be mine and you shall be my Squishy."
im using the astroglide sample u sent me as a bookmark for the book im using to write my midterm paper. i need to get laid. bad.
So currently I have a block of cheese duct taped to my air conditioner in lieu of a fridge.
the only thing i remember last nigh is talking to some chick for thirty minutes about cheese.
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but my underwear and it was on backwards and my entire body is too sore to move...
Im glad someone is finally more of a drunken slut than I am.
its not a party unless mikie exposes himself
DICK PUNCH EXTRAVAGANZAAAAAA!!!!!
Yes. That was the exact moment of my conscience clicking into instant high alert.
Is it counter productive to ride on my exercise bike with a cocktail in hand?
either I'm really high or that last bong rip tasted like christmas
You told me I got kicked out of the bar for lipping off to the bouncers... what shocked me the most was that I made it to the bar
How do I tell this guy that if he does not like the condoms at my apartment, he should bring his own without sounding like a sure thing?
Say it's BYOC night at the beach. And, you are a sure thing. Own it.
You've had it in your mouth, how have you not seen it?
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