am i the only one who has tried sucking their own cock????
just chased whiskey with a pickle. i definitely recommend it
MIND BOGGLER: batman and jesus are the same person. Think about it.
My drug dealer just made me a sandwich at the local deli. Starting to question his street cred.
We've shared an experience, my friend. I, too, have talked on the phone with a parent while giving a handjob
You know you're fucked up when you throw your phone on the roof of the bar to show how good the Otter Box works.
He said bow chicka bow wow. I never thought being sexually degraded would be such a turn on.
it would be a downgrade if your vagina tasted like skittles
Well he's a 33 year old furniture salesman that picked up at 19 year old buying a bedroom set for her room. I can see how that would be awkward
I'm not allowed to have sex with him again. My vagina joined in on the protest. There was a petition. All my body parts signed it.
I banged a guy named Robbie last night and in the middle of sex he begged me to scream santos. I'm pretty sure I just screwed a dude with multiple personalities.
Don't Richard Nixon her vagina
I woke up covered in thousand island dressing. I need answers.
I'm just gonna ride this ego train to sex town
Also, I had mind-blowing sex on a pool table
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